Market Mondays: Laugh, Puny Humans

This market pays less than most of the others I’ve posted, but their Guidelines Page won them about a thousand Crazy Awesome points.  CA points are the way to my heart, and my heart’s doing the typing this morning.

Yep, another publication with a tentacled logo.

If it needs to be said about this fun ‘zine, they’ve said it themselves – which saves me bunches of work, so CA points all around.  From their website:

In another sign of the flagging standards of Wikipedia, Space Squid is mentioned on the Bizarro Fiction entry.

Space Squid is an award-winning hybrid publication of hand-scrubbed scifi, fantasy, and humor. Surely you’ve seen the ‘zine at your local zine superstore? Of course you were amazed at our snarky, outrageous stories, comix, and art. We’ve published work from Bruce Sterling (father of cyberpunk), Chris Roberson (Clockwork Storybook), Jay Lake (John W. Campbell Award winner), Jennifer Pelland (Nebula nominee), and a lot of other cool people. Bruce even blogged about Space Squid. Thanks, Bruce!

Space Squid appears in primarily printed form. The printed zine costs nothing, and when in stock can be shipped within the US for a pittance. It is printed on a semi-sesquiquartely basis. Yes, that’s a real word, not a squid pun.

We also publish samples and original content on this site for free, updated on a piecemeal basis. We’re always putting up new stuff, including ongoing podcast material. Space Squid is closely related to the well-known sci-fi website RevolutionSF. In fact some rumors say that there’s incestuous editor-swapping going on. Scandalous!

We accept and publish any media within our technical abilities, including but not limited to fiction, art, comics, music, spoken word, features, humor, lists, DVD commentaries, and xeroxable found objects.

Guidelines:

Note: Space Squid will no longer accept any humor stories about aliens abducting and raping people. Seriously, every third submission we get is like that and we believe that, although very profound for abductees, these just have nothing left to say to the rest of us.

Space Squid is a scifi/humor ‘zine that’s oriented to people who are bored easily. If your story is boring, then we can’t take it. We reject lots of stuff. There needs to be totally rocking shit blasting out of that story of yours.

What isn’t boring? Subversion isn’t boring. Literary skill isn’t boring. Memorable imagery isn’t boring. Funny isn’t boring. Funny and sad goes a long way. We want to laugh so hard that snot comes out of our noses while crying and beating our breasts. Try digressing from the standard style.

We like funny but it isn’t always appropriate. That’s why there’s a slash when we describe ourselves as a sci-fi/humor ‘zine. To be honest, we’re not even tied to the sci-fi. We’re technically a speculative fiction/humor ‘zine, but we like to slum it in the genre ghetto.

We often publish the story you have that nobody else understands. You know, the one you wrote that’s pure genius, but it’s so far outside the accepted norm of professional fiction that JJ Adams didn’t even bother to scrawl his initials on your form reject. Space Squid appreciates you and we appreciate your vision. And we promise not to give your name to the FBI after we find out what goes on in that freakish head of yours.

Most of the stories we buy are under 1000 words. We’ll usually run one long story per issue, but your best bet is to send us something short that we’re not going to forget. We strongly encourage submissions by women writers who help dilute the nasty testosterone scent in the Squid offices. Try sending us something experimental or something beautiful or something profane. But please, no sloppy wandering grade-school humor stories.

We publish reprints if they rock.

Comics:

Did I say that flash is your best bet of getting in Space Squid? Hell, no. We are so damn desperate for comics, and it doesn’t matter what kind: gag, strip, or full-page adventure. Shoot, even meandering experimental comics with stupid non sequiturs are cool with us.

We’re looking for grayscale images, and if you want to draw to our page, then that would be 8″ tall and 6.5″ wide at 300dpi, but if you’ve got something you’ve already made that you would like to see published, we can probably find a way to make it fit.

Payment:

No matter what you do, all you’re going to get out of us is a flat payment of $5 USD and a contributors copy (that you have to take whether you want to or not). If you are so unfortunate that we accept two of your products in a single issue, then you’re still only going to get that measly five bucks and a copy.

Their Guidelines Page has more, including how to submit.  Check ’em out, order a copy and check ’em out some more, then get to typin’.

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